The Gottman Method is a well-known approach to couples therapy developed by John and Julie Gottman, based on many years of observing couples. It works on three areas: strengthening friendship and respect, managing conflict in a healthy way and building shared meaning in life.
One feature of the method is its clear structure and practical tools. For Persian-speaking couples abroad facing the pressures of migration, distance from family and shifting roles, these tools can offer a new language for talking with each other.
Something else may fit better if…
Work usually starts with an assessment: a joint session, short individual sessions with each partner and sometimes relationship questionnaires. The therapist then reviews the relationship's strengths and challenges with you.
In sessions, the therapist helps you recognise harmful patterns such as harsh criticism, contempt, defensiveness and shutting down, and practise healthier alternatives. Starting conversations more gently, calming yourself during conflict and noticing a partner's small bids for connection are part of this practice.
Alongside conflict, the work also focuses on friendship, appreciation and shared dreams, because these are the foundation of the relationship.
Online sessions usually last around 50 to 80 minutes and often take place weekly or every two weeks. Many couples do short exercises at home between sessions.
The method is structured, but the therapist adapts it to your culture and circumstances. Change usually comes gradually, with ongoing practice from both partners.
Examples are fictional and illustrative.
Samira and Kaveh lived in Berlin, and their arguments quickly turned to contempt and silence. With the Gottman Method they learned to start conversations more gently and to take a short break when things got heated. This example is fictional.
For years Azadeh and Farhad had been more housemates than partners. Exercises to rediscover each other's inner world and daily appreciation slowly brought back warmth. This story is invented.
Taraneh and Mehdi planned to marry and wanted to learn communication skills from the start. A few sessions helped them talk more openly about expectations and values. This example is only illustrative.
These therapists list this on their profile. All sessions are online and in Persian.
It is one approach to couples therapy, with its own structure, initial assessment and specific practical tools. Couples therapy can also be done using other approaches.
Its principles, such as respect, calm conversation and friendship, are meaningful across many cultures. A Persian-speaking therapist can adapt examples and exercises to your life.
Most sessions are joint, but individual sessions may be held during assessment or in particular situations.
If you are in immediate danger, contact local emergency services. Where there is violence, individual support and a safety plan usually come before couples therapy.
This page is general information and does not replace a professional assessment. If you are in immediate danger or thinking about harming yourself, contact your local emergency services. Urgent help
