ISTDP pays close attention to the present moment. When you talk about a specific situation, such as an argument with your partner or how your father treated you, the therapist asks what you notice in your body right now. This focus on detail helps the real feeling surface from beneath explanations and justifications.
Another key part is recognising defences: things we do automatically so that we do not feel something painful, such as smiling when upset, changing the subject or blaming ourselves. The therapist points these out respectfully so that you can choose whether you still want to use them.
The therapist also tracks your level of anxiety and its bodily signs. If anxiety rises too high, the pace slows and the focus shifts to calming down and understanding what happened. So the work is intensive, but it is not meant to be careless.